August 29, 2012

Flaking on Your Friends


This weekend on top of hosting a family get together and going to the ducky races, I also completely  flaked on my girlfriends. I had planned for a girl’s weekend while my husband was to be out of town andwhen plans fell through, I just let the girl’s weekend slip through the cracks.

That was until they called and, with a firm hand, explained to me that honeybadger don’t forget about their girl’s weekend and told me I best be meeting them for lunch.

You see, they wanted to meet for lunch at noon, downtown. Nap time is at 1pm and eating out with Gwyneth is miserable for all involved parties. So, as we have become accustomed to doing, I had them come out to our house for lunch.

This worked wonderfully, for me at least.

The cucumber sandwiches and dorito’s weren’t exactly as gourmet as beer and beet chips from Silver Peak, but they were all I could whip up in an hour and these girls never complain.

My friendships are important to me. Since becoming a mom our friendships have had to change drastically. I'm an introvert that needs lots of coercing to get out of the house, especially with the baby to use as an excuse, and thes girls have a knack for doing that.

We’ve been close for years, seeing eachother through breakups, moves, marriages, graduations, triumphs, downfalls and I was the lucky one who got to introduce us to babies.

It’s been an interesting transition that has been a little bit of a struggle. You see, my girlfriends don’t have babies and once you have one you cross over into this weird parallel universe. I remember being left on the opposite side when my dear friend from high school had her baby. I had no idea how to act, what I was supposed to do, what my role was, etc. I remember calling her when she was in the hospital, trepidly saying, "umm, should I come visit?" and then going to her house with flowers to meet the baby, in shock that she actually let me hold him.

Three months later I had Gwyneth and my friends and family showed me what the supportive role of a mother should be like. I understand that when the baby is new you actually need social interaction. I understand that I can bring over dinner, magazines and it's ok to drop by to say hello. I understand that what moms need most are friends. Regardless of if you have a child or not. These were all things I was terrified of doing before.

So here we are. Me on one side and them on the other. And don’t get me wrong, they are great friends who have done a wonderful job adjusting to us with a baby. They brought me meals, they dote on Gwyneth, they understand when I can't go drinking late into the night anymore. And they know when I need a friend.

So as we sat and chatted for hours about pregnancy, boyfriends and jobs I couldn't be more grateful to have these lovely ladies in my life who aren't afraid to call me out, badger me and change their plans to hang out with us.

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