For seven months I have been strapping myself to a machine for four to six 30 minute intervals per day. Most days, this isn't a big deal. Some days it's a struggle.
Like the day I complained for the sixth time how sick I was of pumping and Sir Sunderland responded how equally sick of hearing my complaints he was. I made a mental note to stop whining and carry on. But sometimes it gets the best of me, like this week. The burden of pumping seemed to weigh heavily on my day to day tasks ending up in a mini break down of sorts.
It's not a hard task, which I think makes it that much harder to understand why I despise it as much as I do. To an outsider it seems like a great excuse to take a break, sit on the couch and hang out at the computer for awhile. But to me, it's boring, tedious and makes me want to scream.
It is something keeping me from doing what I want. Tonight it was not finishing that last glass of champagne, tomorrow it will be locking myself in a room while my girlfriends continue crafting, and the day after that it'll be something else . There is always something better I could be doing and sometimes it just plain sucks to be reminded, like tonight.
After putting the baby to bed I was ready to abandon all household chores and call it an early summer night. You know, the kind where you crawl into bed covered with just a sheet as the cool summer breeze wafts through the window, the sun is still shining, unicorns galloping by.
But wait! What's that? You can't do any of that because you have to pump.
So I did what any grown woman would do. I threw a temper tantrum, sulked, then pumped with an anger so deep I fear the baby might taste it in the morning.
I'll of course be happy I did it come tomorrow but for now I'd like to be angry at the stupid machine that has ruled my life for the last seven months.
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| What happens when the camera and pump supplies are left unattended.... |
1 comment:
My youngest (of 3) is almost 7 and I hated the whole breastfeeding/pumping thing. It does kind of rule your life, doesn't it? But of course, people make you feel like a horrible mother if you don't do it. Well, I just gave up on the last child after about a month of it. And he is perfectly normal and healthy, and intelligent. I'd say he's even advanced for his age. ;) So good for you for being honest about it! And I'm just here to say you're allowed to stop whenever you want-GASP! I've been a mother for 14 years, and trust me, not breastfeeding is really, really far down the list of things I've done to scar my children for life--haha! And I'm really glad you liked the BLT pasta!
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